Last night I was not sleeping so well. It was probably due to a nice long nap in the late afternoon but I just did not sleep well last night. I had some time to reflect on life so far. I hope this is something that some people with cancer will do. I had those thoughts of doing things over, what would I do differently and how happy am I right where I am now.
Would I do anything over as I look back on my life? Sure, there are a few things I would do differently. But if I did, would I be where I am now? I am not sure. I may have been living somewhere else with a different job, maybe a family, maybe not a family, hopefully with some great friends. Who knows?!
What would I have done differently in my life? I probably would have tried harder to finish college the first time. Maybe avoided a few guys as well. However, that means I may not be where I am today.
Overall, I am pretty happy with my life. I have friends who are pretty awesome, I did finish college, I did get married, I have a job that I actually like going to every day, I have a great boss and work with some great people. Do not get me wrong, I have a few things I hated doing now that I look back on it but I would not be where I am today if everything had gone just peachy. Maybe it is those little lessons that we look back on and think, "Oh why did I do that?" that makes us who we are today? If we had not of messed up like we did, would we still be happy? I try not to think like that. Yes, I had a few bumps but I do like where I am. Are there things I would like to improve upon? Umm, yes!! But I have just got to start working on those things.
So, maybe while I do have a few regrets, things are okay in the grand scheme of things. I just hope this summer I do some stuff I had been putting off. Even if it is just on a smaller scale, I hope to get those things done. Maybe you can too!!
Thanks for listening to my ramblings!!
Jenn
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